Short and Sweet!

I went back to school today. Everything was great! Well, the kids were okay but I had no bleeding! Whoo hoo!

One of my online friends suggested that I call my OB and see if they planned on scanning an u/s on me next week because of the bleed. I called and. . . . NOPE! They weren't going to! So, a nurse just called me back and I told them my concern. She said she'll talk with the doctor tomorrow and see if they want me this week or next week for an u/s. News flash- no u/s at all equals me and baby getting a new doctor this week. Good thing I didn't pay for my IVF, I would have been all, "Listen, I paid $26,000 to get this baby. Give me my damn ultrasound." Now that's not very teacher-like is it? Um, yea it probably is!

Well, I'm off to a live fantasy football draft. Yea, my husband does it and I joined him a few years ago. I have won before, so I'm not quitting!

Damn Posts

Just when I post something positive. . . more bleeding today. And it comes at the most unexpected time and just when I'm getting confident. Yesterday I was feeling great. I hadn't had any bleeding in two full weeks. The doctor said the bleed is much smaller and all is good. Well, today I'm all good and running off to a bridal shower when, ta dah! Red blood. I was so surprised that I couldn't even think. I truly said aloud, "You've gotta be kidding me." I mean, really? Right when we are on top of the world. I know it doesn't necessarily mean anything but how could a person not spend a ton of time thinking about it?

Then, at this bridal shower today, my friend just goes on and on about how hard it is to be 38 weeks pregnant. Blah blah she has to pee all the time and eat all the time. You know, I realize that being 38 weeks pregnant must suck, but life can be so much worse. Don't think for two seconds I let her off the hook. Oh no, no, no. I will forever have the infertile mind. I made sure to tell her to be thankful she could walk. Be thankful she has a full term baby and I told her about girls who do over 100 days of bed rest just to keep their kids alive. I know, I know. . . what a downer. But it's reality, and it shut her negative ass up real quick. I hope I'm in her position some day.

So, tomorrow is the third full day of school and I won't be going. Luckily I have the best sub in the world and a very understanding principal. Taking time off already is very hard for me, but I know that resting is so important. My doctor had said 72 hours for every red bleed, but I'm not sure if I can do that this early in the year. That's one thing that teaching does to you. . . it gives you guilt.

Well, that's my update. I'll be in bed from now until at least Tuesday morning.

Day by Day

School has truly taken over. This week has been so busy. Though it wasn't a full week, I've come home and been more than exhausted! It's always hard to get back into the groove of things.

Things have been going really well. I know the RE told me that my bleed was getting much smaller, but I'm dying to know where it is now. I'm hoping my OB will allow me a first scan to see where it is. Other than that, we are just taking it day by day. Mr. Later Than Most is rather out of control lately. Starting this week he's been "baby this" and "baby that." It's really weird considering he doesn't want to tell anyone until 16 weeks. He did say something funny last night though. He goes, "Man, we really have a lot to buy. We should start shopping at 13 weeks." This was music to my recreational shopping ears! You see, I know Mr. Later Than Most very well. I have not mentioned any shopping, purchasing, or other baby ideas (well, partly because I'm still a little scared). I know that if I don't mention any of it to him, he eventually will think of it on his own and he loves his "own ideas." I guess this is a tiny form of manipulation but it's totally harmless!

As I mentioned, four ultrasounds later and I'm still nervous. Each day I wake up and think "am I still pregnant?" It's so dumb, but it's the damn infertility Devil. She still hangs around a bit, but she is definitely on her way out the door. I'll show her ass. I'm going to add a pregnancy ticker to my blog today. Take that witch!

Things are coming full circle for me today. It's my nieces first birthday. On this day last year I truly hit rock bottom. My sister had her second baby in the time that I couldn't come up with one. I remember how hard this day was for me. Now, one year later, today is a totally different story.

Life is good!

Another Graduation!

Today was a big day. . . graduation! Today's graduation was better than either of my Master's. Today I graduated from the reproductive endocrinologist. That's right, I'm normal! No more IVF clinic :) I had my last scan today and little Trouble is measuring 7w6d which is still one day ahead of the IVF calendar. So, my new EDD is April 5th. Also, the perigestational bleed is smaller than it was last week! Whoo hoo to that! Tomorrow I will receive the exact measurments, but the u/s tech was as happy as can be! I'm really going to miss her!

My first OB appointment is September 7th. That's two weeks from tomorrow. The wait will be very hard as I'm addicted to weekly ultrasounds. Although, this is the cost of being "normal." But seriously, I plan to have them scan me right away to check on that bleed. I'm really hoping it's gone by September 7th.

Here is Trouble's latest photo at 7w6d. Oh, and Mr. Later Than Most totally approves of the name :)

Kohl's: More Than You Bargained For

I need new school clothes. My bloat makes me look pregnant, so I'm on a mission to hide it. Of course Mr. Later Than Most thinks it's so cute and claims it's all baby and not bloat (boy, he really needs to read a baby book!). Actually, I love that he thinks that!

So I went to Kohl's as one of my stops. I figured I'll look for more flowy type tops so no one notices my stomach after lunch. I walked around and around and figured I would drop into the maternity section when I was done as a last resort. I know I don't need maternity clothes, but I've heard about those maternity pants that have a regular waist and those would be fab. Well, I was hit by a nice clearance when I went into the maternity section. I tried a bunch of stuff on (because it was so cheap) and duh, the stuff made me look pregnant. So, I did buy one denim maternity skirt because it was only $15 bucks and a denim skirt is good for all seasons of teaching.

After finding a couple of other items in the women's section, I made my way to the checkout. My cashier was kinda like Mrs. Rogers would be. I watched her thumb through my stuff. As she came to the maternity skirt, she eyed me up and down, looked at the inside tag, pointed to it and said, "Does this mean anything?" Um, huh? What what the heck was she talking about?

Me: Yea.

Cashier: Oh, when are you due?

Me: Not for a long time. April 6th.

Cashier: Oh, I think you should just tell people April 1st. (Wow, that's weird, but thanks?)

Me: (smiling and biting tongue)

Cashier: Can I give you some advice for when the little one is born?

Holy shit. I'm like 7 weeks pregnant and this lady is already planning the birth. I wanted to tell her that I'm just trying to make it to week 8, but what the heck am I going to say with a line full of people who are now eyeing me up and down?

Me: Sure.

Cashier: When your baby is born, go get the newspaper and seal it to preserve it. Also, collect all of the coins from that year and put them in a plastic box. Then, your child will have the news baby and some coins from their birth!

WOW! Now, that was very sweet of her of course, but really? LOL My friends know that I'm not good with unsolicited advice. I don't know why, it's like a personality flaw. I mean, if it's good advice then I love it, but normally it just rubs me the wrong way. In this instance, I just thought it was really interesting. I felt guilty enough buying a maternity skirt at 7 weeks. From now on, I will take my purchases to a male cashier. Men will not give parenting advice to a woman, right? LMAO

Gotta love Kohl's.

Moving Along

Wednesdays are a huge milestone to me. They mark the beginning of a new week of pregnancy. Yesterday I hit 7 weeks! That means seven weeks ago I had my retrieval for IVF. I can't believe how fast this time has gone by. I'll be honest, I'm that girl who wakes up every morning and thinks, "Oh, 7w1d today!" That's okay, I could be doing worse things.

As for symptoms, I don't feel I have many. I know it's early, but on some forums I'm reading about girls saying how sick they are and tired at 5 weeks. Okay, I'm a little grateful that's not me! For me, I have a couple things that are different than pre pregnancy. First, I have a taste for nothing. This is pretty common this early. I can't find anything I want to eat, but my stomach will be growling and needing something. Normally, if I just find something that might sound good, it settles well. The other thing I noticed is that I get hungry sooner than normal. Yesterday I had lunch at 1pm and was literally starving by 5pm. That was really odd to me. How in the world will I have lunch at 11:25 during the school year and then not get home until 5pm? I will for sure need to do some better grocery shopping! Oh, I also have a fun case of insomnia. This actually started before the 5 week mark. I toss and turn all night long and go between the couch and the bed. Sometimes I wake up at 3am and I'm just wide awake. Now, if I didn't feel so lazy, I may actually be productive at those 3am wakings! Now, laziness may not be the right word, I just have no energy. If anyone in my family read this, they would literally think this was not my blog. I have never had an energy problem. I am constantly on the go. Right now, I kind of just look at the things I would like to do, and I wave to them from the couch. This is no way to look like Heidi Klum after the baby comes. Oh well, I have until April anyway.

I feel like if I don't talk about "the bleed," then maybe it doesn't exist. But I'll bring it up to tell you that I'm going back to my acupuncturist tomorrow. I have not gone to him since my retrieval. I started going in March for several reasons. First, acupuncture is supposed to do wonders for infertility. Now, it won't get you pregnant, but it will help. So, I started going to support the infertility, and because I was totally stressed out. I mean, I seriously hit my max on stress. My only options for the stress to were to manage it or seriously start talking to a therapist. So, I found an acupuncturist in my town and decided to start there. I spilled everything out to him and he was confident he could help. I tell you, after that first appointment, I felt like a new person. I was less anxious and I felt relaxed. So, I started going regularly. Yesterday I emailed him to tell him that my IVF worked (whoo hoo), but I kinda have the SCH issue going on (which is now called a perigestational bleed per my IVF nurse). Well, good 'ole Jim thinks acupuncture can help with this. So, tomorrow I'm off to get acupuncture again. I hope to go once or twice a week to get this bleed out of here! I'll be sure to update how it goes!

Oh, and do let me know if it sounds like my list of symptoms sounds like complaining and not updating. I promised myself to never complain about pregnancy if I ever got pregnant, and I really plan to stick to that. So, if I ever get out of line, feel free to let me know:)

Let's Talk About "Trouble"

So, I've talked about Heather before. She's my BFF from the TWW website. Yes, we've talked about finding internet friends before. If you don't have a friend in real life that you met online, then you are really missing out. I know it sounds creepy, but if women can find husbands on dating sites, why can't you find yourself some new friends on websites? All of my online friends are from TTC and pregnancy sites. I'm sure you are not surprised by that. Anyway- Heather and I decided that this little baby needed a name. Lots of people have cute names for their teeny embryos. Yes, I am aware that women normally do this with their husbands, but Mr. Later Than Most wasn't around for the texting. So, I decided that this LO was going to be named Trouble. Now, I know that sounds a little negative, but I think it's cute. . . especially after the whole bleeding crap that's been going on. It's so not the LO's fault at all, but I kinda like Trouble. Plus, Mr. Later Than Most is kinda trouble himself. ;)

Now for a real update! Today I had another u/s. This is u/s three in one week. Mind you, this is the ONE benefit of being an infertility patient. It is the only thing we get to brag about to those lucky preggers who get KU on the first try. In fact, on my message boards you'll hear girls say, "ZOMG, how am I going to wait until my 10th week for my first ultrasound?" Then, us infertility bitches come in with guns blazing, "Yeah, that must be hard. I've already had 5 ultrasounds and I'm only 7 weeks along!" ZING!!!! Again, this is all we have on them. And really, we don't do that, but it's better than their "How long did it take you get to preggo?" post that they love!

As I was saying, I went for an ultrasound today. My regular tech was there so I was excited to see her. Now, because I have an issue, I watch the tech like a hawk. If she doesn't speak within 60 seconds of moving the "magic wand" around, I'm ready to have a panic attack. Luckily, my experienced tech knows better. :) So, right away she tells me she sees the "peanut" and that the little heart is just beating away. She points the screen to me and is showing me how "great" everything looks. She obviously doesn't know what a Google whore I am, because right away I ask, "Do you see any bleeds?" She admits that she does, but she wants to focus on the baby first. Hmmmm, I know that trick. I do it at parent teacher conferences: good news first, not so good news second.

So after she tries desperately to use the 3-D machine to take a picture (omg, Trouble looked like a blob!), she points out the bleed. YEA, the bleed that was NOT there on Thursday. Damnit! She told me not to worry. It's a subchorionic bleed, which is common. Now I don't know what you consider common, but online it says like 5% of pregnancies. You know, since I'm already in that small infertility percent, I was kinda hoping I wouldn't be so "lucky" again. After my research I found that there is no explaination for SCH bleeds. It could be from implantation or not. Either way, the options are 1. it bleeds itself out 2. the body absorbs it 3. it causes some trouble. In worst case scenerio, it can cause miscarriage. Dr. Google says 1-3% miscarriage rate. So, that's where I'm at. I will go back to the RE on Monday for another scan, and I will also see my OB on that day. Scary stuff.

Right now I'm just relaxing. They told me over and over that I must take it easy. So, I'm doing just that. I'll stay on bedrest until Tuesday night. It's 72 hours for each bleed, and I had a teeny tiny bit on Saturday, so I'm counting that. Tomorrow my blood work will be in, so I'll talk to my IVF nurse and see what she says. Online I read that baby aspirin and progesterone can help rid bleeds, and I'm already on both. When you get bored, Google progesterone for my week of pregnancy. I'm off the charts at 107 at my last reading. That high of a number is normal found in the second trimester, so at least I have that going for me.

So, continue sending your thoughts and prayers. I'll take every one. For your viewing pleasure, I have two pictures of Trouble. I got smart and I put them on the light of my computer screen when taking a photo of them :) So, this is Trouble at 6w5d:

Trouble seems to be flying! It's the yolk sac:) The second u/s is the 3-D one

Another Sucky Day

Need I say more? I think you get the drift here. More spotting on Saturday night. I haven't left my bed in days. My next appointment is on Monday morning.

I think it's a really cruel joke to pull on someone who had to get pregnant through IVF. I'm just sayin. Not that it's any easier for anyone else, but life kinda sucked already. Isn't there a such thing as too much life suckage? Probably not.

**Sigh**

Laying Low

I'm still laying low. Doctors orders, I have until Sunday at noon to chill out in bed or on the couch. Thankfully, I haven't had any issues since Wednesday night. Each day that goes by, I feel a little bit better.

So, what have I done whilst stuck in bed for a little over two days? Ask and you shall receive. . .

1. Googled the crap out of what happened. I don't suggest this.

2. Watched about five episodes of Toddlers and Tiaras. Thank you to Comcast On Demand.

3. Spent way too much time on my chat forums. I mean really, I just jump from one to the next.

4. Watched more reality TV. A little Holly's World, Kardashians, Kourtney and Chloe. . . you name it, I saw it.

5. Internet gaming. LOL This is a new one. Mr. Later Than Most had volleyball last night and I really needed something to do. So I found myself a cute bingo game and won some "tokens." Then Mr. Later came home and I switch to roulette. We played (yes, we, he took over) that for a little while. I suddenly have 10,000 tokens.

6. Oh and I napped of course.

So, hopefully my classroom gets done this week. It's in shambles. Oh well, this is my 9th year teaching, I should be able to make it work. :)

**Sigh** A Scary Evening

Last night = not fun. I had my first (and hopefully last) pregnancy scare. I went to the bathroom (like I do every hour on the hour) and I had red blood and some light cramping. Not cool. Immediately the worst is coming to mind. I had about two "wipes" full and then it was gone. I freaked. Mr. Later Than Most was there to calm me and we agreed that I would call my RE in the morning.

This morning I gave them a call right away, but I got the IVF nurse's voicemail. Within an hour, I didn't have a call back. That was a little odd considering the situation and I knew that bloodwork would have to be in by 9:30am, so I called again. This time I was able to talk to the IVF nurse. I was so mad at myself because I cried on the phone with her. She reassured me that bleeding could be very normal, but since I was feeling crappy, she let me go in for a an ultrasound.

Mr. Later Than Most met me there from work. The ultrasound tech said everything looked great. The little heart was beating away, the baby measured right on track, and she saw no bleeding internally. After meeting with her, the IVF nurse came in and talked to us about our situation. She assured me that bleeding is common and it doesn't have to mean anything. She said it could be blood vessels, the suppositories I'm using, or a slew of non important things. They sent me home on 72 hours bed rest to be extra cautious.

One would think that I'd feel so much better after hearing a good report. I'm a little better, but just worried. I know there is NOTHING I can do. What will be, will be. But either way, it just plain sucks. Lucky for you, you'll be getting a lot of Later Than Most blogs while I sit in bed until Sunday.

More Numbers :)

I knew I wouldn't care too much about the beta numbers from yesterday when they came in today. Once I saw that little heartbeat, I knew things were moving smoothly. But, when they gave the numbers today, I went back to my old self and Googled them in a beta calculator. Relief. . . they are totally on track! Monday's beta was 10,069 and progesterone was 107. The doubling time is 1.9 days. I didn't need to look it up because the nurse told me it was all normal, but I kinda have an addiction.

Other than that, I tried to work in my classroom today. Although, I get there and don't really get too much done! There is no air conditioning, so I just get too hot and then don't want to work. Today I did a little bit and then decided my nice cool house would be so much more fun. Oh well, I'll try to put a full day in tomorrow.

Of course a day can't pass without me worrying about something. Today I got up from the couch and had a HUGE pain in my abdomen. It actually made me yell for a brief moment. I have no clue what it was. Felt like a muscle, but of course it's on my mind every five seconds. I tried to think of what I could have possibly done to bring that on, but nothing came to mind. At this rate, I'm going to have a long 34 weeks ahead of me. I really need to stop worrying. You know, I've actually thought about going to "talk to someone" regularly about all of this. I should have done that before the IVF, but I didn't. I think a lot of IF girls wish they would go and see someone. It's something for me to think about. I need someone to keep me grounded, and Mr. Later Than Most tries really hard, but he doesn't know any better. First, there is just no way men can be as vested as we women are. I mean, we feel every little thing and analyze every thing going on in our bodies. I know he's vested, but there is just no possible way for him to be as much as I am. Hey, at least I know this early on!

Well, here's to hoping that tomorrow is a worry free day!

Update!

My ultrasound #1 went fab today! I got to see the LO and. . . . . . the heartbeat! It was early at 5w5d but it was there! I'm so excited. I go back for another ultrasound next Monday and then I'll be released to my regular OBGYN. I'm so excited that I have nothing else to say!

While I'm Waiting

Monday's ultrasound cannot get here soon enough. I'm eager, excited, nervous and anything else you can name. I'm trying to pass the time as best as I can. Of course I'm dying for that ultrasound, but I'm also ready to hear if my IVF restrictions are still in place. Oh yes, there is a list of things I currently "can't" do. These will seem extreme to you, but think of the things IVF does to a person's body. Re's like to make sure that there is no chance you can ruin what you've worked so hard for.

So, there is a lifting limit of 10 pounds. I know that probably sounds decent, but I've been pretty strict on this. For instance, I ordered a shower gift from Crate and Barrel and it came yesterday. The box said it weighed 10.5 pounds. I didn't bring it in the house. Mr. Later Than Most got home 4 hours later and brought it in. Hey, no reason to not be cautious! Actually, I now wander around the house wondering how much things weigh.

House work can only be light. No vacuuming. Yup, no vacuuming. I'd like to tell you that this is going well, but this is day three that Mr. Later Than Most has forgot to vacuum. To make myself feel better, I pushed the Swiffer around the kitchen today. Actually, I cleaned for like and hour and then decided I shouldn't do more today. So, I've been watching movies ever since!

No baths and no swimming. Let me tell you, I'm dreaming about baths right now. Not that I've taken many in my life, but I've never wanted one more. Again, this is an extreme one, but they want absolutely no risk of infection. So, no chilling out in water.

Um, no intimate time with Mr. Later Than Most. Trust me, after two years of trying, we're kinda okay with this right now. :)

I'm still taking several medications. I've gotten used to the gross Endometrium inserts three times a day. The baby aspirin is kicking my ass. If you were to sit on my lap, I'd probably get a giant bruise. My arm is still very black and blue from last Monday's blood draw!

So, that's the list. Luckily, I'm a book addict and have been reading a bunch of stuff while I'm waiting for my appointment. I love to plan things and be overly prepared, so the baby books are on my daily reading list. Also, I've been doing some internet browsing as well. I know it's way too early, but I love shopping and it helps me stay positive. I truly haven't bought anything, but I love looking.

Tomorrow I have breakfast with some girlfriends. As I've mentioned before, one of them is onto me. So, I'll be having my first cup of regular coffee tomorrow morning. Yes, I will go that far to throw her off. I don't want people speculating and talking about me. They can wait until October to find out :)

Well, truly this is a boring weekend. Mr. Later Than Most is out golfing and then a BBQ with friends. I didn't want to go to explain the lack of drinking, so here I am. I have plenty to do to prepare for the upcoming school year and to get my classroom ready, however, I'm pretty sure those scissors weigh around 12 pounds, so I better put that work off just a little bit longer :)

Mixed Day

I made my first call to my IVF nurse today. Before I explain, if you are a "normal" person who hasn't dealt with IF, IF girls will sound a little irrational to you and sometimes even psycho. I say that in the nicest way. By psycho I mean, over-over analyzing everything. So, since my BFP, I've noticed that I have a sensitivity on my left ovary. If I stretch too tall I feel it. If I suck-in my stomach I feel it. If I push on the spot, I feel nothing. I've pretty much given myself this fear that I could have an ectopic pregnancy (tubal). Why? Because I think I feel a sensitivity on the left side, only when I suck-in. So, I called the IVF nurse and told her what I'm feeling. I also come right out and tell her that I've had ectopic pregnancy on the brain. I also asked her if ectopics happen with IVF. I mean, I literally saw my doctor shoot those embies and he said "perfect place to land". The landing spot was not a tube. I also asked her if all of those IVF drugs are still in my system and possibly if that's why I feel a sensitivity.

So, she says that ectopic does happen with IVF, but it's not very common. She said that I should worry if I'm in pain or I can't use the bathroom normally. Mind you, I'm peeing almost every hour and I have no pain, so I'm squared away there. She also said that I'm going to feel a lot of odd things as my body is changin, but my ultrasound on Monday is to rule out an ectopic pregnancy. Sounds great right? Not. So. Much. I was literally hoping she would just tell me that everything would be great, worrying is normal, and I'm in the clear. I'm very aware that this is not her job. I'm also aware that telling someone all of those things can give a person false hope, but I was still actually looking for it. After thinking about my situation more, I did have a little relief. Right after my IVF, I had pain on my left side. In fact, when I woke up from the procedure, I immediately asked for some pain killer because of it. So, it kinda makes sense that it could be the exact same spot that gave me trouble. So, that was my worry for today. Sometimes I feel much better writing it out in my blog. Also, I know I have girls following my blog that are doing IVF, and I want them to know that these feelings are totally normal. Speaking of normal, there is a Pregnant After Infertility board on the site I go on. I don't post on PAIF, but I always read the advice. Well, tonight I ventured over there to see if anyone was dealing with the same worries I'm having. BINGO. I immediately see a post similar to my concerns. Not about my specific worry, but a girl was explaining that she can't believe she can't be happy about her pregnancy because worry has taken over. After her post, about ten girls commented saying that they too are worrying all of the time. Some of those commenters are 36 weeks along. I was glad to come across this post. It let me see that my worries are rather normal and more than likely, for no reason. Now, on to a happier topic! I was in a class today with a bunch of teachers in my district. All of a sudden, we start talking about our insurance. One teacher said that our insurance sucks because we have no infertility coverage. My ears perked up right away! I couldn't believe that I was sitting a room with someone who dealt with IF! I know it exists, but this was nice and close to home. As if it couldn't get any better, THREE other girls (YES THREE) started agreeing. One said she's on Clomid and has to pay for it. Other girls said they had no coverage when they had their babies. IF is so common, but not talked about much. Well, I didn't chime in for several reasons, one being that some of my close coworkers were there and I'm obviously not announcing. I did get to chime in though and tell them to start spreading that word about our lack of IF coverage. If it's a popular concern, we can try to negotiate for some coverage on our next contract. It was an exiting moment for all of us. Although, I think one of the girls is onto me! She is pregnant and wearing a Be Band. I've also been wearing a Be Band due to the bloat. Well, I saw her scope my Be Band out! Oh well, I have other things to worry about ;) If you are still reading, you deserve a cookie!

Anniversary Tomorrow

I swear this is been an interesting week (Thursday to Thursday). I'll have that BFP and one week will bring me straight to my anniversary, which is tomorrow! MH and I will be married for 3 years. Actually, it seems like forever. . . we met at 19 and we are both 32. We don't have any huge plans (that's just the way we roll), but I'm making him take me to dinner. Not that I have a taste for anything lately, but I saw this cute place called The Country House, and I want to see what it's like.

On the BFP front, today is actually 5 weeks. I know that is nothing, but right now each week is an accomplishment. I got a little excited when I read on my forum that many girls were getting morning sickness at 5 weeks. I'd love that reassurance (in a weird way).

Other than that, I have some sleepless nights lately. I toss and turn, followed by being wide awake, which is fun at 2am. It's not the IF Devil, so I'm not sure what it is. I do know that I'm freaking hot all the time (progesterone) and that makes me toss and turn. Poor Mr. Later Than Most, our air has been on at a steady 71 degrees. That'll be a fun bill!

I'm excited to see 20 followers. Although, I don't feel like I've been too entertaining on my blogs lately. Hopefully I can spice things up a bit for the readers :)

Each Day Gets Easier

Today I have not had a visit from the IF Devil. I'm so excited that I have been able to relax without worrying. Sometimes I'm too relaxed and I have to put myself into place. For instance, I may have scoped out some baby books on Amazon. First of all, I can justify any purchase, but this Amazon browsing is okay to me. :)

On my regular forum I post on, I made the jump from the Trouble Trying to Conceive board, to the April 2011 Moms board. I truly would have preferred to stay on TTTC for a while longer, but it is board etiquette for someone with positive betas to not stay a regular poster. They have a TTTC Graduates check-in once a week, and once in a while I will help answer some IVF questions. Otherwise, it looks like the April 2011 board will be my new home. It's a weird jump to make, but that's probably where I fit better.

As for real life (besides the Internet), I'm just enjoying my two days off from classes and I'm waiting for that August 9th ultrasound.

Life is good.

Beta #2

What a day this was. I thought for sure I would handle today pretty well, however, the wait was just killing me. My beta draw was at 8:30am. I made sure to ask the blood tech if she had my cell on file and she agreed that they did. So, I kept myself busy with preparing for the upcoming school year. Yes, that is how desperate I was.

Well, 2pm rolled around and I was getting impatient. By 2:30 I thought I was going to throw up. I'm not kidding here. All of a sudden my mind went crazy. I started imagining how the nurse was waiting to call me with bad news. I had visions of Dr. Miller himself calling to tell me how sorry he was. Yes, as you can see, this is my IF Devil at her finest. At 3pm I decided to call. I would just apologize for my impatience and I knew they would understand. The first time I called I got the office voice mail right away. DAMN IT! I hung up and called back in about 10 minutes. I got a hold of the receptionist, who passed me through to the nurse voicemail instead of the actual nurses. I was frustrated, but I knew the nurses would not leave without calling me back. So, I left a very kind voicemail saying that no one had called me yet, and I just wanted to make sure that I had not been skipped. At about 3:20 the IVF nurse called me back.

Nurse: Hi Melissa!

Me: Hi, how are you?

Nurse: I'm good Melissa. Look, your beta numbers are actually left on your office voicemail. Me: Oh, I had no idea! No one told me.

Nurse: Yea, after the first positive beta, we just leave you messages with instructions. Me: Okay great! Sorry about that. I really had no clue.

I hung up that phone so fast it's not even funny. I ran into the kitchen looking for my dial-in info for my office voice mail.

"Hi Melissa. This is Patti at Dr. Miller's office. Today is August 2nd and your levels look good. Your HCG (beta) is at 817 and your progesterone is 101. Make an appointment for your first ultrasound on August 9th and continue to take your baby aspirin, prenatals, and Endometrium three times a day."

HOLY CRAP! 817? I was praying for something around 600. That's a 1.5 day doubling time. I am so relieved and just all around excited. As I keep saying, I'm going to be cautious like any other girl. First trimester is a long time, but I promise, I'll be happy every single minute!