Yes, as my title suggests, I'm on the bottle. Well, baby and I are both on the bottle. This week was my first glass of wine! Horray! And Brooklyn is completely on formula. Yes, my body failed me. Even pumping didn't work. I took the Fenugreek and drank the Mother's Milk Tea. I didn't see an increase in supply. In fact, one day last week I just quite pumping, cold turkey, and I only had to pump one time for relief. So, cheers to drinking wine. I'm enjoying a glass of Polka Dot Riesling!
All of my help is gone! Yesterday was my first day alone with Brooklyn. We left on our first road trip at about 9am. We headed off to S's house to see her and the twins. Brooklyn was great on the ride there and I even stopped at McDonald's for coffee! At S's, it was great. She has her whole living room set-up A La Baby. Well, it looks like my place put she has two of everything. The girls were so cute. They pretty much all complained and ate the whole time, but S and I enjoyed each other's company. I tried to help her once, but her little one knew I was a "mommy fill-in." LOL We meant to take pictures, but never got around to it. It's amazing to think that those three girls were all embryos in the same lab and developing at the same time. Sometimes S and I joke that Brooklyn is hers and one of her twins is actually mine. The only thing is, both girls look like her husband and Brooklyn has my mouth. So, we are thankful that they were not mixed up in the lab! Ha! Next week S and I plan to get together twice.
Today was a little more tough. Brooklyn and I woke up around 7. I cleaned a little and she enjoyed her swing long enough for me to eat. At about 9am I thought, "I could get used to this." I was watching Oprah and rocking B in my arms. By noon I was bored to pieces! I had used every baby equipment I had and was out of ideas. I finally bundled B up and took her for a walk. At 1pm I was counting the time until Mr. Lather Than Most would be home at 5pm so I could have a little break. B didn't nap at all today, therefore I didn't nap either. But, you won't be surprised to find that she's sleeping now, because it's Mr. LTM's shift. Such a daddy's girl! I wonder what in the heck I'll do tomorrow for an ENTIRE day. I always knew staying at home would be rough for me. I know it'll be hard to leave B in August to go back to school, but I'll need the routine I'm sure.
Emotionally, I feel much better. Thank goodness those hormones hang out for a while and then take off. OMG, I felt like the white van was going to come and take me away. It's a terrible, terrible feeling. I'm so glad to be feeling better. I truly owe it to Mr. LTM. He made sure I was getting enough sleep and every day told me that my emotions were temporary. He envisioned what B would look like in the next year and tried to make me think about the future and not the day I was on. He's a great guy :)
As for scheduling, it's actually almost time for me to go to bed! I sleep from 8pm to about 1am. The Mr. LTM comes and gets me and he goes to bed. B normally eats around 2 am and then 4am. Sometimes she'll awake at 6 and sometimes 7. I HATE going to bed at 8pm, but I have no choice. She's not sleeping during the day and it's my only time to really sleep. So, I have three hours a day that I'm awake and doing my "own thing." It's rough, but I'm sure I'll adapt.
Off for a wine refill!